All of us game for different reasons. For many, the excitement comes as a chance to temporarily escape this reality in an attempt to lessen the stress this world has to offer. I game for a different reason and I write to share that reason. Now, it would easily be noted that I have not written in a few months. I am quite sad to have been away for so long, and even sadder to say that I am not done from this temporary hiatus. But I emphasize that this is temporary! So, let me give a few things to chew on as we all tackle this reality that we call life.
My hiatus started with a very simple concept… I’ve lost my passion for writing! This was because of an issue I have been dealing with that came back to rear its ugly head in my life. Like a cursed lich that just won’t die, this thing keeps haunting my life and I can do little to fight back. So, I’ve lost my love of writing and am now on a journey to find it again. I became complacent in my dealings with everyday life and decided to escape my way, which surprisingly isn’t gaming. This has been a recurring problem in my life and I want finally to rid myself of this complacency. So, what I’ve decided to do is begin going to weekly writing groups to inspire and encourage me and guess what… It’s working! I’m able to come back here and, even though I won’t be able to add much more to this blog for a little while longer, at least I can add something! If complacency is driving you away from you passions, I offer this word of encouragement: “Poor is he who works with a negligent hand, but the hand of the diligent makes rich.” -Proverbs 10:4
In the midst of my complacency, another hitch came up that drove me deeper into my self-absorbed sense of entitlement and escape: anger. This has mostly been directed to my father, the man who introduced me to my joy of gaming and writing. Most of this has been quite undeserved. Recently, he moved two states over to be near his family in our great state of Texas, but every step along the way to settling him in his new home has been met with resistance, either from him or external sources. Instead of dealing with them with the grace gifted to me, I’ve instead selfishly become irritable to the point of becoming somewhat of a jerk! Not kewl! So, I’ve begun a second journey, and one of higher priority. I seek to learn humility and remove self from the equation of life. Hopefully, this will ease a lot of the stress and anger in my heart and renew my passion to share this love so deep in my life both on this blog and with anyone I might meet! Anger can easily drive us from the things we love, so: “Know this, my beloved brothers: Let everyone be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” -James 1:19-20
We are all afraid of something. I fear heights above all else! Another fear I have, which might be humorous, is members of the opposite gender. Well, recently, I’ve found myself interested in an amazing young woman with what seems very little chance of being able to get to know her further. To my credit, part of this has been due to the amount of time and effort I have had to expend on behalf of my father, but more accurately, it is because I’m afraid she’ll reject me. What’s funny is that I have no chance of receiving the gift of marriage without the risk of rejection! So, giving into my fear and doing what’s comfortable in my escape has been counter-productive to what I really want! Talk about backwards. Whatever fear drives us from our goals in life, there truly is hope: “‘Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am Your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand.'” -Isaiah 41:10
Whatever issues we face, we all have our little quirks that we rely on to escape the madness! For many, the game is a great escape. For me, it’s usually something different. But even when life gets in the way of the game, when worlds collide, we have to remember that it’s only temporary and we will be able to rejoin the fray at some point. Sadly, I must bid thee a further farewell, but I shall return, once my world rights itself once again. It is only a matter of time, but know that I miss you, friends and I think about you often, considering the game and my God have been the only things consistent in this inconsistent world of mine.
I leave you with this: the game, though a common escape for us geeks, is only temporary. The encouragement that keeps me going, and hopefully will strengthen you comes from God alone. “Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you.” -1 Peter 5:7